Audition
AUDITION
featuring:
Stephen LeBail as Producer
Bob Woolsey as Casting Director
Wade Fennig as Kevin Bannick
and
Andrew Menzies as Himself
Tags: acting, audition, Bob and Andrew, pink scarf, stephen lebail, wade fennig
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The Bob and Andrew Show: Freedom Party Recap
Bob and Andrew went to their friend Nicholas Humphries’ party last Friday. Nick was celebrating his freedom from the work force as he goes back to school for his Master’s degree. Get a full rundown of the party’s events in this podcast… or at least what Andrew can remember of them. Also discussed is Andrew’s dilemma over a bag of chips he was double charged for at Safeway and just what benefits and perks a Master’s degree entails.
Click the little triangular button below to listen:
Or DOWNLOAD it and listen to it on your Ipod.
Tags: andrew menzies, bob woolsey, Comedy, party, Podcast, The Bob and Andrew Show
Filed under Podcast | 14 Comments »
Ways to Die
If you are like me, you are afraid of dying.
However if you’re exactly like me, you are also interested and intrigued by the way in which you are going to go.
I’ve compiled what I feel are the three best ways to die.
Now, I know a lot of you will inundate the comments with shouts of “Where is internal combustion?” and ”What about angina?”. Well, a blogger can’t please everyone. I have tried to narrow the list to the pristine level of death: the top three ways I think one can exit this world. If you’re somehow upset, hurt, or offended I excluded something you or a loved one may have or someday wish to endure, I am sorry.
And onto the death!
Tags: andrew menzies, death
Filed under All Blogs, Andrew's Blog | 5 Comments »
The Bob and Andrew Show: The Bad Haircut
Bob got a bad haircut. He tells the tale of it in this very episode. Andrew recalls the fashions of his youth and how he had a brief fascination with tear-away pants. As always Bob and Andrew try to make sense of their lives through comparing them to movies. In this episode: Orange County, Stand and Deliver and Dangerous Minds.
Click on the play button right now to listen!
Or DOWNLOAD it and listen to it on you Ipod.
Tags: andrew menzies, bob woolsey, Comedy, faux hawk, Haircut, Podcast
Filed under Podcast | 6 Comments »
I’d Rather be Sailing
Since I was but a boy I have heard the call of the ocean, beckoning me to take my rightful place in this world as a seaman. Unfortunately I was born inland with a deathly phobia of sharks. However, my longing for the sea has not waned and I remain facinated with the naval tradition even today. How does this affinity for all things aqua affect my everyday life, you might ask? How do I cope with this unrealized dream that burns deep down inside me?
Well, I listen to a lot of Jimmy Buffett, I watch The Hunt For Red October whenever it comes on TV and I take baths instead of showers whenever possible.
You might say I’ve given up on my dream of being a sailor. You might also say that I’ve lost part of who I am by not following this passion. You might be a jerk. But, as we all know, you can’t be everything you want to be in life. Some desires have to give way to others so that we may be genuinely successful at one thing rather than kinda good at many things. It’s how we deal with these lost opportunities that make us into one of two kinds of people:
1) Happy, well adjusted, relatively normal individuals.
2) Losers.
Here is my theory on how to make sure you end up as number one instead of number two:
Tags: All Blogs, ballerina, bob woolsey, Comedy, dancer, dreams, golf course, restraining order, sailing
Filed under All Blogs, Bob's Blog | 1 Comment »
Lake Michigan Stand Off
Written by Bob and Andrew
Directed and Edited by Darren Borrowman
Featuring
Trystan Carter as Ken
Aaron Brooks as Mike
Bob Woolsey as Bob
and
Andrew Menzies as Andrew
Tags: aaron brooks, andrew menzies, baby, bob woolsey, darren borrowman, donut, punch, sketch, sketch comedy, trystan carter, Videos
Filed under Videos | 9 Comments »
Shake On It!
Let me open by saying that the handshake is becoming a lost art. I am deeply saddened by this.
Sure, we have fist-pounds, high-fives and various other hand movements that can mean a variety of different things at an any given time, in any given context. The sheer amount of variation in these hand motions make them inherently confusing. If you buy a house from a guy and he tries to high-five you it could mean anything. Yeah, maybe he’s just happy for you. But then again, maybe he just swindled you out of thousands and thousands of dollars. Who knows? The handshake however, is clear. The handshake is resolute. The handshake is steadfast.
Since the beginning of time, or at least since the Romans, we’ve been using the handshake to signify some kind of cooperation. It’s an acknowledgment of a new acquaintance, a finalization of a deal or a congratulatory gesture. In whatever form it takes, the handshake can be trusted as a traditional gauge of a person’s character.
Tags: All Blogs, bob woolsey, bribery, Comedy, handshake, technique
Filed under All Blogs, Bob's Blog | 3 Comments »
Letting Other People’s Art Define You: Hooray!
Sorry Blouin, don’t mean to step on your dick, but I’m slapping a little technology into my blog this week.
Myspace, for those of you too cool for school/who have attention deficit disorder, was the big social-networking site before Facebook shot its beans all over the Internets.
The differences between Myspace and Facebook are glaring, but that’s not that this blog is about. Though I turfed my clusterfuck of a Myspace page about a year ago, I still find myself yearning for some of the site’s more gnarly features: Profile music playlists, over-sized and flashing backgrounds, and the fact that you can be friends with Satan . However I still find Facebook’s clean, unified themes much more appealing.
The big featuring lacking on Facebook are bulletin posts. You may argue that "the wall" and "notes" accomplish relatively the same thing, but you’d be wrong, cocksucker. Bulletins were updated in real time in a box right on your main page. While on Facebook you have to looking for your friends’ list of pasta recipes or drunk-diatribes about ex-lovers, Myspace has its car crashes right there, unable to miss.
I got to thinking about the similarities between the two giant sites, and how they more or less allow young people to define themselves based on books, movies and music other people have created. This dovetails nicely with a popular note that was frequently sent around Myspace: The Life Shuffle.
Tags: More Stuff!, music, myspace, shuffle
Filed under All Blogs, Andrew's Blog | 3 Comments »
Dinghy
Featuring:
Bob Woolsey as Charlie
Darren Schilling as Alvin
and
Marcel Perro as Rodger
Written by Andrew Menzies
Directed by Darren Borrowman
Tags: andrew menzies, bob woolsey, darren borrowman, darren schilling, Dinghy, eating, marcel perro, ship wreck, wreck
Filed under Videos | 7 Comments »
I enjoy the occasional drink
I like to drink.
Alcohol is a wonderful invention, possibly the highlight of the Roman empire.
Booze can do many wonderful things for you.
Examples:
1. Improve your vocabulary.
2. Improve your balance/agility.
3. Cause you to make friends with people you wouldn’t normally associate with (hobos, prostitutes, the elderly)
Tags: 18, beer, bob woolsey, booze, coke, crack-cocaine, jager, party time, rum, rye, sean minogue, steve blouin, whisky
Filed under All Blogs, Andrew's Blog | 8 Comments »
Grand Theft Adulation
Several days ago I blogged about Grand Theft Auto IV and how it is ruining my life.
I have since decided that there are a number of practices and facets of the Grand Theft Auto world that would translate well in to real life.
I present to you the best eleven of sixty-four I was able to come up with.
First and foremost the ability to be shot and killed, only to resurrect seconds later with just a small amount of your money taken as a penalty is certainly something I and other thrill seekers would enjoy immensely. Often times I have looked at a building and wondered, “Could I jump off that not die?”. A no-death law would make every answer to that question an emphatic “yes”.
Tags: andrew menzies, apples, auto, babies, BASE jumping, blouin, bob woolsey, capitals, cats, change, death, fight club, grand theft, GTA IV, jump, life, murder, murders, niko bellic, sex crimes, word
Filed under All Blogs, Andrew's Blog | 3 Comments »
The Bob and Andrew Show: The Perfect Lair
In this episode Bob and Andrew discuss, at length, the makings of a great lair. The best lairs throughout time such as The Bat Cave, The Fortress of Solitude, etc. Bob expresses his misgivings about having to house-sit in the upcoming days and Andrew tells an embarrassing story about one of his closest friend’s private area (It’s near the end).
As always, press the little play button to listen:
Or DOWNLOAD it and listen to it on you Ipod.
Tags: andrew menzies, bat cave, Batman, bob woolsey, lair, superman
Filed under Podcast | 3 Comments »
A recurring dream in which Henry Rollins punches me in the face.
I like Black Flag. They’re not my favourite punk/hardcore band, but I definitely respect them. I treat them the same way I do Led Zeppelin. I understand that they’re good, why they’re held in such esteem in their genre. I own a few records, the major pieces. You know, I wouldn’t travel across the country to see them reunite, (especially if it’s in Toronto), but I’ll rock out to “Rise Above” if iTunes hits in in shuffle mode.
I bring up Black Flag due to the recent events in my mindchamber, where in which I have apparitions of assault courtesy of one Henry Theodore Rollins.
Tags: black flag, buzzcocks, iggy, portland, punching
Filed under All Blogs, Andrew's Blog | 5 Comments »
Travis & the Alien
featuring:
Trystan Carter as Travis
Amy Couldwell as Clara
and
Bob Woolsey as Dave
Tags: Abduction, Alien, Amy Couldwell, andrew menzies, bob woolsey, Close Encounter, trystan carter
Filed under Videos | 4 Comments »
Good Music: Let Me Tell You What!
There’s a lot of people listening to a lot of music these days. You’ve got your top 40 airheads, your R&B/rap mofos, your alternative rock peeps, your screamo weirdos and so on. Music, like porn, seems to have mushroomed into a relentless eruption of uncontrollable proportions during the digital age. Anyone can download a couple programs, buy a mic and become a recording artist. These artists make up the ‘independent’ scene of course. Like in film independent recording artists are allowed a much greater leeway with what they produce since there’s no real money being put on the line by anyone but the artist themselves.
Again like film, big record executives now watch the indie scene for bands that are getting some buzz or creating a following. They then poach these artists (sorry, ‘discover’ them) and make millions of dollars off their hard work. Wow, I sound like Steve Blouin. Anyway, this is the basic lay of the land, as they say, in the music industry today. The question I raise is this: With so much stuff out there, how do you know what’s cool? And by extension, how do you know what to listen to in order to make yourself seem cool to others? Read on my friend, the answers lie below.
Tags: bob woolsey, indie band, jimi hendrix, johnny cash, kurt cobain, music
Filed under All Blogs, Bob's Blog | 15 Comments »
The Bob and Andrew Show: Dinner with Anyone, Who’s Your Choice?
In this episode Bob and Andrew discuss the screenplay of their lives. They argue over who would play them should it ever be produced, what the storyline would be and if they should take liberties to make it more exciting. Also discussed is the age old question: If you could have dinner with 4 people, dead or alive, who would you choose to break bread with?
Hit the little play button below to listen:
Or DOWNLOAD it and listen to it on you Ipod.
Tags: andrew menzies, bob woolsey, Comedy, dinner, hitler, jack black, JFK, Podcast, steve gutenberg
Filed under Podcast | 3 Comments »
Grand Theft Auto Ruined My Life
I am not a videogame guy. I used to be a videogame guy, about five years ago. It was a pretty serious habit: four, five hours a night, shooting terrorists in SOCOM 2, online with some buddies. I had a rank of Lieutenant and was invested in protecting it, raising my position by getting head-shots and extracting hostages.
I curbed my habit in late 2004. I stopped playing altogether to prepare for the rigors of film school, which believe me was tough as Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas had just hit stores. For those of you who don’t know, the Grand Theft Auto series is as close as it gets to ball blasting perfection. GTA3 opened a whole new chapter in the world of videogames, while Vice City a year later Luckily GTA:SA was a clusterfuck of cheesy storytelling and ridiculousness (seemed easy for poor urban teenager Carl Johnson to get hold of jet packs and F16s). Nevertheless, duty called, and I logged back onto SOCOM as soon as I graduated.
As the X-Box 360 launched and my other, weaker friends moved on to harder and harder stuff, I decided to clean up for good. I Craig’s Listed the fuck out of my PlayStation 2, and didn’t look back. Two years pass, and even though I smoke the occasional cigarette and drink like a fish, I have no other serious addictions.
Enter Grand Theft Auto IV.
Tags: crack-cocaine, GTA 3, GTA IV, videogames, wrecked life
Filed under All Blogs, Andrew's Blog | 7 Comments »
Truth or Dare
featuring:
Wade Fennig as Sol
Stephen LeBail as Ped
and
Steve Blouin as Himself
Tags: andrew menzies, bob woolsey, car, catfood, funny video, game, sketch comedy, stephen lebail, steve blouin, truth or dare, wade fennig
Filed under Videos | 15 Comments »
The Bob and Andrew Show: The Shout Out Controversy
So there’s been some shout out controversy of late. Bob and Andrew put to rest once and for all in this show. Andrew lays out his theory of idiots/morons. He also goes into his time on the Debate Team during grade 11. Bob discusses his time in the Chess Club. All in all it’s one of the coolest episodes of the Bob and Andrew Show you’ll ever hear.
Click on the little play button and enjoy:
Or DOWNLOAD it and listen to it on you Ipod.
Tags: andrew menzies, bob woolsey, Chess, Comedy, Debate, funny, idiot, Moron, Scott Browne
Filed under Podcast | 8 Comments »
How to be a Ninja in Everyday Life
As we all know, Ninja-ism is a way of life. Not just some guy in a black suit lurking in the shadows – that’s a child molester. Ninjas are elite warriors who have been trained from childhood in the intricacies of a centuries-old martial art that utilizes stealth, physical prowess and honor. But it’s not just the Ninja’s ability to perpetrate an assassination that makes them cool. No, Ninjas have a lot more we can learn from them. In fact, a lot of the Ninja teachings and Ninja philosophy have everyday applicability.
Since the first Ninja, Prince Yamato of Japan, people have continually been in awe of the Ninja’s sweet ass ability to lay the smack down. You just don’t mess with a Ninja. They don’t take shit from anyone and they do WHAT they want, WHEN they want. What could be more cool? We’ve all been in those social situations where skills in sabotage, espionage, scouting and hand to hand combat would come in handy. It’s in these very situations that we should look to the tradition of the Ninja to guide us.
Tags: All Blogs, bob woolsey, karate kid, ninja, pat morita, stealth, yamato
Filed under All Blogs, Bob's Blog | 2 Comments »