A Bob Woolsey Tribute to: Well-Fitting Pants
Posted on August 6th, 2008
I like a lot of things in this world. There’s a lot of stuff that I see and think “Hey, I should tell people about this!” Hence, this blog.
This particular tribute: Well-fitting pants.
Let me begin by saying that I am a fan of well dressed people. I admire their ability to put outfits together and walk the streets stylishly. However, I do not consider myself a well dressed person most of the time. Appropriately dressed? Yes, but well dressed? That’s a stretch. I like the old t-shirt and jeans combo – or perhaps the t-shirt and shorts combo, depending on the season. T-shirts are easy to find. There are plenty of people making really cool t-shirts (Jadefish is a perfect example). You don’t even really have to try them on. Once you know your general t-shirt size, you’re set. Pants however, are a different story.
Is it just me or does every single clothing store have a different measurement for jeans? I go to one place and 34×34 fits great – I go to another and it’s way too small. I should say that I have little or no patience when it comes to shopping for things, especially clothes. If I have to try on more than one pair of pants, I get very cranky. Obviously, as I’ve outlined above, due to the stupid lack of standardization between clothing stores, I often do have to try on 3 or 4 pairs of pants in any one outing. As a result I avoid shopping for clothes at all costs. In the last year I would say that I’ve shopped for clothes a total of about 4 times. And I hated each and every one of them.
Which is odd because I really like the feeling of getting new clothes. You go out of the house after de-tagging all your gear, confidently sporting the entirely new outfit. It feels good. Like a fresh haircut. Could it be that the pure agony you have to go through in order to achieve this is what makes the feeling so sweet? I don’t know, but I do know that there is nothing better in this world than a well-fitting pair of sharp looking new pants.
You know what I’m talking about – those pants you slip on that hang off your hips as though part of your body. So comfortable that you’d rather wear them than be naked, even when alone. That finely cut fabric that accentuates your personality so well that you feel unstoppable while wearing it. It’s a power so dangerous that it has been taken to extremes so grotesque you could hardly imagine. Leather pants come to mind. But even then, who could resist the temptation of another animal’s skin tailored to fit your legs so perfectly?
The notion almost allows me an understanding of high fasion.
Almost.
When all is said and done, pants are about comfort and functionality. They keep you warm, guard your legs from various scratchy things and provide that oh so spectacular place to put your keys. This is why women had to invent purses. In fact, one could even argue that pants are the reason the Woman’s Liberation movement took off so successfully in the first place. They saw the pant and said “I want to wear those too! They look so comfortable.” And they were right to do so.
Pants truly are an historical item. And I love them.
Here’s to you — Well-Fitting Pants.
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Tags: bob woolsey, leather pants, pants, tribute
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5 Responses to “A Bob Woolsey Tribute to: Well-Fitting Pants”
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andrew Says:
August 6th, 2008 at 3:58 pmI just bought twenty pairs of socks. I can rest easy knowing for the next twenty days, I will have brand new socks to wear.
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bob Says:
August 6th, 2008 at 4:08 pmThis is a pants blog Menzies!
Write a sock blog if you wish, but stay off my shit with irrelevant ramblings!
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Meghan Says:
August 6th, 2008 at 5:50 pmSocks suck. Long live PANTS!
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Scott Says:
August 7th, 2008 at 2:18 amSocks suck? Yeah, except for the fact that they’re the greatest thing ever.
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bob Says:
August 7th, 2008 at 9:58 amI don’t wish to weigh in on the sock controversy. I only wish to praise the glory of well-fitting pants.