How to Become a Serious Artist

Posted on August 28th, 2008

I don’t know if anyone has heard or not, but I am a theatre director now. That’s right, I directed the current mounting of This Is Our Youth, running at the Havana Theatre (1212 Commercial Drive) till Saturday. It’s a famous play. It’s been performed many times by many actors. Among some of the most notables are the likes of Mark Ruffalo, Hayden Christensen, Jake Gyllenhaal and Anna Paquin. It’s been on Broadway with ‘big time’ Broadway directors. That’s all well and good of course, but I think it goes without saying that the material has never really been in the hands of a truly serious artist – such as myself.

How did you get to become such a serious artist, Bob? You may be thinking to yourself as you read this. Well, it wasn’t easy, I’ll tell you that. There were many long roads, twists and turns, winding paths, spiral staircases and just down right poorly designed freeways along the way. I’m a man of perseverance, taste and above all integrity. These are the qualities that have allowed me to survive as an artist against all odds. Here today I will outline for you my rise through the ranks of this business they call show in the hopes that maybe, just maybe, I can help someone else to stick to their dreams and never give up.

I was born by the railroad tracks. Down and out on the wrong side of town. We didn’t have much growing up. My mother looked after my brother and me while my dad worked his hands to the bone as a tradesman. It was a tough life but we made the best of it. My father was a hard man and instilled in me a drive to succeed. I had to work in order to earn my keep around the house and I did not disappoint. But I knew early on that my life had a different meaning. I had another drive deep within me that would not be quieted. A burning desire that could not be quelled. A dream that could not die. A destiny that would not cease until it had taken its course. A fate that was woven into the fabric of time long before I was even born. A plan that only a greater power could truly understand. A fabulous power that was revealed to me the day I held aloft my magic sword and said…

But I digress.

My point is that I was meant for art. I was more intelligent than most during school and my instructors encouraged me to great things. But I was bored with their tutelage. My mind was drawn to something that could not be taught. Something so vast and all-encompassing that the universe itself pales in comparison to its greatness. Something only the Greeks have ever come close to discovering. A secret so raw in its power that even I, the incomparable Bob Woolsey shakes in fear at the very mention of it. Something so ancient and sacred that only a deserved few have ever been able to harness it.

I’m speaking of course about the perfect artistic creation. A manifestation of pure originality. Among some of history’s greatest:

Hamlet
A Tale of Two Cities
Adventures in Babysitting
The Ninja Turtles
The Predator Series
Crash
The Dark Knight

Throughout my rise to the top I’ve encountered many naysayers. Many downtrodden would-be artists who gave into their lesser instincts and sold out to the highest bidder. But I kept my head high and looked toward the sky everyday. I guess what I’m trying to say is that it’s a long way to the top if you want to rock and roll. So my advice to anyone out there who doubts themselves. Anyone out there who isn’t sure if they have it in them. Anyone who feels like they’re down for the count. Anyone behind the eight ball. Anyone struggling to stay true to themselves as artists. I say this: Keep on truckin’ because you never know.

Bob Woolsey out.

P.S. This Is Our Youth
Written by:
Kenneth Lonergan
Starring:
Andrew Baker as Warren
Sean Gilchrist as Dennis
Sydney Cochrane as Jessica

The Havana Theatre
1212 Commercial Drive
August 26 – 30
Doors at 6:30
Curtain at 7:00
Tickets $15

Tags: A Tale of Two Cities, ACDC, Adventures in Babysitting, anna paquin, artist, bob woolsey, Crash, director, Hamlet, hayden christensen, HE MAN, jake gyllenhaal, kenneth lonergan, mark ruffalo, The Dark Knight, The Ninja Turtles, The Predator Series, thespian, this is our youth
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3 Responses to “How to Become a Serious Artist”

1. phoenix Says:
   August 28th, 2008 at 6:00 pm

   Greatness runs in the family. But I still think you’d do better if you changed your name back to Ray, as God meant it to be. ‘Bob Ray’. Yes.

2. bob Says:
   August 28th, 2008 at 11:55 pm

   I will consider it. After all, some of the best writers of all time have had pseudonyms. I mean, Mark Twain? It doesn’t get much better than that.

3. Scott Says:
   August 29th, 2008 at 12:26 am

   I’ll read this blargh in the morning when I awake from my slumber.

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