Best Christmas Ever
Well, here it is in all its glory: Best. Christmas. Ever.
Created as part of the Laughing Stock 72 Hour Comedy Competition, Best Christmas Ever took home the awards for best director and best writing.
Tags: 72 hour comedy film festival, andrew menzies, best christmas ever, best director, best writing, bob woolsey, Christmas, Comedy, darren borrowman, funny, grandpa hollingsworth, holiday, laughing stock, lauren martin, marcel perro, puke, punch, ryan tapping, santa, short film, smashed tv, stephen lebail, sucker punch, tom belding, winner
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Raincity 72 Hour Noir Film Contest
Last weekend Bob and Andrew were approached by their good friend Darren Borrowman to write a short film for him. Little did they know that they would have little over 4 hours to do it. As part of the Raincity 72 Hour Noir Film Contest, Bob and Andrew penned the script for “Pier Pressure” which was directed by Mr Borrowman. It’s a comedy noir along the lines of “Naked Gun.” Starring website regulars Lauren Martin, Stephen LeBail and Jamie Slade along with one of Darren’s friend’s Tom Belding (who is amazing in the film) and featuring a fantastic score by the lovely and talented Red, Pier Pressure is sure to finish among the top films in the contest.
You can attend the screening Saturday, March 21st, 11:30am at the Rio Theatre near Commercial and Broadway in Vancouver. Tickets are 10 dollars.
Tags: 72 hour, andrew menzies, bob woolsey, competition, darren borrowman, film noir, Jamie Slade, lauren martin, naked gun, pier pressure, rachel watson, raincity, red, short film, stephen lebail, tom belding
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Ciel Gout Delicieux
Directed by Nicholas Humphries
featuring:
Charlotte Chanler as Dorothy
Lauren Martin as Claire
and
Alan Sung as Boss
Tags: alan sung, andrew menzies, bob woolsey, charlotte chanler, donut, funny, lauren martin, nick humphries, plants monthly, satyrists, sketch comedy, Videos
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B&A Show: Las Vegas and the Oscars
Bob and Andrew discuss Bob’s recent trip to Las Vegas as well as Andrew’s disdain for the Oscars.
Tags: andrew menzies, bob woolsey, casino, hatred, las vegas, new york new york, oscar
Filed under Podcast | 8 Comments »
Robot
Directed by Darren Borrowman
featuring:
Bob as Scientist
Stephen LeBail as Robot
Tags: andrew menzies, bob woolsey, darren borrowman, funny, Robot, science fiction, sketch comedy, sodomy, stephen lebail
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Birthday Happy, Andrew
I don’t mean to toot my own horn but since no one else seems to want to, I’m left to celebrate my birthday via blogging.
Today I am twenty-four years old. Older than Super Nintendo, younger than the World Trade Towers.
I’ve got more years on me than Mickey Rourke’s chin, but less than Cher’s tits.
Twenty-four years. Woopity doo.
I burst through the vagina at exactly 4:44 PM, February 16th, 1985 (consult your Almanacs). I was greasy and irey: thespians will recognize this as foreshadowing. A welcomed changed from months in the womb, I was a stand-out example of what a baby should be. What a baby can be.
Did you bring a coat? Good, cause I’m about to take you on a journey.
Tags: 1985, 24, 9/11, andrew menzies, biggie smalls, birthday, bob woolsey, cher's tits, Neil Young, tupac, vaginal birthing
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The Bob & Andrew Show: John Hodgman’s Duck
The evolution of a sketch - part one.
Bob and Andrew describe their working relationship. They read a sketch that Andrew wrote which will be shot and posted to the website down the line.
http://www.myspace.com/deltaspirit - check them out if they’re coming to a city near you. They put on a great show!
Tags: andrew menzies, Bob and Andrew show, bob woolsey, delta spirit, duck, how to write, john hodgman, sketch comedy, weekend, writing process
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Tetris
I am not a gamer by any means. I do not own a gaming console. My computer has never been sullied by having a game’s filthy information installed on its pristine hard drive. I do not spend hours online talking dirty to people I’ve never met while navigating the planes of Azeroth, nor do I comment on message boards with speculation as to what the next Star Wars game will entail while my Mom yells at me to come upstairs for dinner. I’m a simple man with simple tastes.
On the other hand, I have been known to obsessively play the most brilliant piece of pass-time programming ever created: Tetris.
That is until recently when I discovered a startling fact about myself. I have all of a sudden lost all skill for the game of Tetris. I woke up one morning and sucked at the game I have held so dear for so long. It’s been a devastating epiphany that I have struggled to deal with.
Come now as I illustrate my journey from one time Tetris terrific-o to current day Tetris terrible-o.
Tags: bob woolsey, chris hansen, More Stuff!, Sexism, tetris
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The Bob & Andrew Show: Update
Andrew and I thought we’d try something new and do some Vlogs instead of podcasts for a while. Here is our first. It’s kinda scrambled as we didn’t so much have a plan about how we were going to do this, we neglected to plan our “exit strategy,” if you will. We promise better ones later.
“Don’t Call Me Zombie” Screening Friday, February 13th in Vancouver. Email Bob or Andrew for details if you want to attend. View the Zombie page here: http://www.bobandandrew.com/short-fil…
bobandandrew.com live at the Wise Hall on March 4th. Tickets $20, all proceeds go to charity. No, we will not actually be working for beer.
Also, that is the wrong Youtube URL at the end of the video. It’s supposed to be youtube.com/BobandAndrewShow. No underscores.
ROCK!
Tags: andrew menzies, Bob and Andrew show, bob woolsey, live show, mylie cyrus, Nicholas Humphries, racist, update, wise hall
Filed under Podcast | 8 Comments »
Heartbreak
Directed by Nicholas Humphries
featuring:
Stephen LeBail as Hearbroken Man
Tags: alley, andrew menzies, bob woolsey, depression, Heartbreak, Nicholas Humphries, Relationship, stephen lebail, yelling
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Kids: Pros and Cons
Children, I’m told, are our future.
They are the progeny of our race. As animals, some might say that it is Humankind’s sole purpose to create them and propagate our species. Others would say that we have moved beyond this basic savage need to a more enlightened sensibility. Either way, children are everywhere.
I’m sure you’ve seen them around. They are the portion of our populace that is between birth and puberty. They’re short, dim witted little things that are unusually cute and annoyingly loud. Don’t be fooled by these simpletons outward appearance, however. Although they possess welcoming, warm little faces with big eyes and pudgy cheeks they are burdens to society. You see, their underdeveloped brains and puny bodies make them unable to clothe, feed or sometimes even go to the bathroom by themselves.
All of this raises the question: why do we even have children in the first place? The joys of sexual intercourse, perhaps? But we’ve developed contraceptives so that we can still engage in a little nookie without risk of conceiving a child. On the other hand, there must be benefits to the challenging endeavor of rearing young. Surely people do it for a thought-out reason of some kind.
Let’s explore the pros and cons, shall we?
Tags: bearing young, bob woolsey, children, kids, list, pros and cons
Filed under All Blogs, Bob's Blog | 6 Comments »
The Lunch Break
featuring:
Charlotte Chanler as Carly
Sean Gilchrist as Geoff
and
Bob as Greg
Tags: andrew menzies, bob woolsey, charlotte chanler, childhood, Comedy, jump rope, lunch break, play ground, sean gilchrist, sketch, skip rope
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Alone on Christmas
Directed by Nicholas Humphries
featuring:
Stephen Lebail as Dan
and
Andrew Menzies as Hobo
That’s it for us this year. Thanks to everyone who has come by to watch a video, read a blog or listen to a podcast. We’ve got a lot more great stuff coming up in 2009. Stay tuned!
Tags: Alone, andrew menzies, bob woolsey, card, Christmas, hobo, hockey, holiday, Nicholas Humphries, stephen lebail, tree
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The Argument
Directed by Nicholas Humphries
featuring:
April Green as Julie
and
Bob as Kevin
Tags: abortion, andrew menzies, april green, argument, bob woolsey, Christmas, Comedy, funny, morning, Nicholas Humphries, Relationship, sketch, terrible news
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What Christmas Means to Me
What does Christmas mean to me?
Jesus? No.
Family? No.
Good will towards men? No.
Christmas means one thing to me and one thing only:
Presents.
Whoever said it was better to give than to receive must have never gotten a good present in their life. Gifts are like love that you can touch. They warm your heart and possibly even your physical body in the case of an electric blanket.
So here is my Christmas list for this year. Think of it as Oprah’s favourite things episode except without me giving anything away.
Tags: 386, bob woolsey, Christmas, computer, genesis, gift, GT sno racer, legend, list, packard bell, present, sega, star trek the next generation, street fighter 2, teenage mutant ninja turtles, turtle van
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The Lair
Directed by Nicholas Humphries
featuring:
Bob as McManus
Wade Fennig as Rich
Robyn Edwards as Secretary Voice
and
Andrew as Tailor
Tags: andrew menzies, bob woolsey, evil doer, funny, lair, plan, robyn edwards, scheme, sketch, Videos, wade fennig
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The Bob & Andrew Show: A Star Wars Sex Talk
This week on The Bob & Andrew Show, Bob and Andrew discuss which wild animals would be the best to keep as pets, and Bob recounts his experience with the bible.
Things get a little blue when the topic of the Star Wars is brought up. Bob thinks Chewbacca might be gay. What does Andrew think? There’s only one way to find out…
Click play to listen or download for your iPod.
Tags: andrew menzies, bear, bible, bob woolsey, catholic, dave menzies, Gay, Jesus, marriage, pet, pigeon, sex talk, shark, star wars, swallow, terry wharburton, uncle mike
Filed under Podcast | 4 Comments »
2009: A Harder Look Ahead
There is nothing finer a man can do than to rip off another man’s work so blatantly and without remorse.
Today I oblige by thieving from my cohort and often times partner in crime Bob Woolsey, whom several hours ago made bold predictions about the upcoming year of our Lord, 2009.
I was born February 16th, 1985, on the same pool table in Newark, N.J. where I was conceived. In grade four I got an award for a short story I wrote, mostly because I was the only child to submit theirs into the contest. I worked at McDonalds for two and a half years, never felt any real trauma or pain in my childhood, and graduated high school with mediocre grades and aspirations. Oh, and when I was three I fell down a flight of stairs and cut my chin on a vase. Nineteen years later I fell down a similar flight of stairs while stoned out of my mind looking for a vase to put stolen flowers in. I guess you could say my life has come full circle.
So it is with great accomplishments already behind me that I look forward to 2009 and the challenge of going farther. Further? Farther? Fuck. Let’s just look ahead.
Tags: Barack Obama, bob woolsey, bourne identity, david bowie, italians, male heir, marriage, monkey, newark, vase
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2009: A Look Ahead
I think it’s important to treat each new year as an opportunity. I believe the Christians do a good job of conceptualizing this by calling each new year God’s year, a year he hath made for you and me to enjoy. Too bad they’ve done nothing but hold the world back for 2000 years. Now that my insult of mainstream religion is out of the way, let’s talk a bit about my hopes and dreams for the year ahead.
Since I was born on September 28th, 1983 I have steadily been progressing as a person. In the beginning I couldn’t even walk, talk or do basic calculations. But through hard work, a positive outlook and my unrelenting desire to better myself I slowly overcame the challenges of being a baby and am now a fully grown adult. There have been many milestones along the way, many occasions. I was named fire chief for a day in kindergarten, I came in second place in a speech contest in grade 1, I won a spot as a junior fire fighter for the forest service the summer after grade 12, just last year I finally buckled down and learned the guitar - I suck, but I have campfire skills, and more recently I was awarded along with one Andrew Menzies, the best Sitcom writing team award from the prestigious Vancouver Film School’s Writing for Film and Television program in late 2005.
So it is with great accomplishments already behind me that I look forward to 2009 and the challenge of going farther. Let’s look ahead.
Tags: 2009, andrew menzies, astronaut, BC forest service, bob woolsey, crock pot, fire fighter, helicopter, hernia, john grisham, kraft dinner, nasa, new year, plans, pne, roast, robert pattison, september 28th 1983, sharks, stephen lebail, twilight, vancouver film school, writing for film and television
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Things Hip Hop Music Has Taught Me
I like hip hop. Granted I wear a belt with my pants and despise uncurved baseball hats, but I do enjoy it when an MC steps to the mic like a phantom and drops lyrics that could skin a cat.
For years I was confused about the difference between “rap” and “hip hop”.
What are the fundamental anomalies? Is there a clear line between the two? Who is Funkmaster Flex?
I suppose I could have investigated the issue, perhaps asked around. Instead, I just made up my own mind and defined the rule as it stands to me. Because really, musical taste is a tricky bitch. We all like different things; a lot of people probably hate your favorite band and the sooner you understand that the better off you’ll be. So why now make up your facts?
This is my hypothesis: Rap is money/hoes/guns. Hip hop is about the beats and the musicianship. It’s soulful and poetic.
Hip hop is also about guidance, leadership and life lessons.
Tags: beastie boys, bob woolsey, eminem, eric b and rakim, George Bush, hip hop, immortal technique, jay z, ludacris, Mos Def, public enemy, rage against the machine, rap, rehab, run DMC, talib kweli, white kids
Filed under All Blogs, Andrew's Blog | 5 Comments »