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Dear Starbucks,

Several moons ago I made outlandish hate speech regarding the corporate coffee apparatus known by the proletariat as The Starbucks.

I suggested that Starbucks was inherently evil, due to its gross popularity, bean-business, and fashioning of a pseudo-elitist culture.

I may have over-stepped my bounds.

I would like to issue a formal apology on this Internet, and ask that Starbucks and its customers forgive my rash and thoughtless denouncement.

I am truly sorry.

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Coffee Conundrum a.k.a. Stargh-bucks

I’ve been inside of a Starbucks exactly six times.

Only one instance involved me purchasing a coffee. (The line at Tim Hortons was too long and I can’t go back to Blenz because I made a comment… look, this blog isn’t about me.)

It’s about Starbucks.

Generally I am very pleased when big corporations begin to go bankrupt. I’m not this big, anti-conglomerate socialist guy or anything; merely because I am a contrarian, and that applies to other people’s success.  “Why should your company be so big and powerful?  I will enjoy watching you burn.”

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